14 Days of Genitals, Day 6: Giant Squid Schlongs

Squid are nothing but tentacles and head. Cephalopod literally means head feet. So if you're a cephalopod, whatcha gonna do with all that junk, all that junk inside your trunk? 

GIT YOU LOVE-DRUNK OFF MY err... tentunk(le)??

14 Days of Genitals, Day 5: Blue Balls to the extreme

Male Vervet Monkeys have blue testicles. And if the number of google images with them staring in bewilderment at their own nuts is any indication, they are as disconcerted by them as we are.

Wait, WHAT?

Huh.

14 Days of Genitals, Day 4: When and How to Castrate a Giant Animal

Animal population control is serious business in most countries, including the United States where all sorts of livestock are castrated. This keeps animals from getting aggressive and lets farmers direct breeding efforts to maintain high quality livestock. But not all animals are created equal, and so not all animals are a quick snip-and-brand or snip-and-stitch surgery.

First off, did you know that not every animal has testicles that descend from their body? Sometimes, those things stay inside and hidden, and you have to go rootin' around looking for them like a pig with a prize truffle.

Testicle, truffle, whatever.

14 Days of Genitals, Day 3: Double The Trauma(ta) for all of Squamata

Unpleasant penis surprise of the week: all squamates have been blessed with a pair of peckers. Check out the goods on that Burmese Python below!

Double Penetration takes on a new meaning

14 Days of Genitals, Day 2: Gettin' busy with Hymenoptera

Hymenoptera is an order of insects that includes wasps, bees, and ants. Whether a hymenopteran is male or female is determined by the number of chromosomes an individual gets: if you get a full set, congrats on your upcoming lady parts, but only half and you just get to be a dude-bee (sorry). 

GUESS WHICH BEE ONLY HAS HALF A SET OF CHROMOSOMES???

The extra chromosomes come entirely from the mother, which means that putting hos before bros actually gives your genes a greater advantage. Hymenopterans are often eusocial: they have hives with female workers, a queen, and a couple of random dudes just around for baby making (less fun when you realize that mating actually turns their testicles inside out).