What Can I Wear to This Conference?

What should I wear to this conference

That will help me get a good job?

I want to look professional, I want to look respectable,

But I own more field pants than real pants

And most of my closet's quick-dry
Nothing in my closet says "take me into the field!"

Without also saying "I am a slob!"

Conferences are supposed to be professional

But that's only part of this job.

Problem Number Two: I'm a girl.

I'm short and I'm blonde: people don't expect much from me (they should)

Should I wear heels, or dye my hair?

Maybe they'd listen better if I was a brunette

Or wore a sports bra. 

Tits don't get tenure-track.

Awesome Dead Shit: Odobenocetops, the Walrus-Whale

What do you get when you take the droopy-lipped visage of a walrus and say, why the hell not, let's attach it to a whale?

Pure, undiluted genius, that's what you get.

 Yes, this monstrosity that nature shoved together to confuse you was a real animal: the gloriously graceful Odobenocetops, or walrus-whale!

Such beauty and grace should never have gone extinct.
Damn you mother nature, for taking away this marvel of natural selection.

Backcountry Navigation Tips: Bush Evasion Tactics

Amy is back in Alaska, and preparing herself for a job that involves collecting deer poop in the back country. Yes, that's a job, and yes, we'll talk about it in more detail in a future blog post. But Meaghan is feeling helpful, and wanted to give Amy a few tips she learned in the backcountry while surveying for lichen and slugs (yes, that's also a job, and yes, we'll talk about that too some day). Today's tips are all about the worst part of fieldwork: getting through shrubbery.

See, all bushes are horrible when you're walking off trail, but they're all awful in their own ways: each is its own special, shitacular snowflake. Some bend beneath your weight only to slam back up into your crotch when you least expect it, while others offer a wooden jungle gym you'll have to force your way through like Catherine Zeta Jones in Entrapment. Here, Meaghan shares some of her top moves for circumnavigating shrubbery struggles.

#Sarcasticthumb

Interview with Marli Miller

We recently went out with the Marvelous Marli Miller who is not only a professor at the University of Oregon, she’s also a photographer, and an author! That’s right: she’s a scientist who STILL MANAGES TO HAVE TIME FOR HOBBIES! Meaghan and Amy joined Marli for dinner and while she attempted to eat the Vengeance Team peppered her with all sorts of bizarre questions. Kelly, Amy’s boyfriend joined because Mcmenamins has a great $10 burger and brew deal on Monday nights and, more importantly, because he is also a big fan of Marli Miller. Because really... who isn't?

Geology-Inspired Nail Art

Those nails are so gneiss

Recently Meaghan showed Amy some very cool "burned book" fingernail art and pointed out how much better it would be with scientific figures. Amy took on the challenge the next rainy day. The result? Geology-themed fingernails!!! Now we are bringing the nail magic to you, faithful readers, so follow the tutorial below to be the most stylish geologist* of the century!!!

*Admittedly not too hard to be when most of us wear sales-rack REI quick-dry shirts and paint-stained mom jeans, completing our outfit with a sweat-stained fishermans hat. Still, we bet that look (Field Gear Chic) would go great with strat column fingernails!